Laugh about it, It will all be over soon

To me sometimes it is easier to laugh at a hard situation than it is to just sit there and criticize yourself for the rest of the day. A time that I was able to laugh about pain is now I stress out about home and school. On one hand I knew that my other four years of High School I would be expected to finish my work on time but yet when teachers would find out that I was related to other students that they knew did not do there work and another that was excellent at what she did, I was put in their shadow’s with different teachers while other teachers never knew my family up until they got me. At home I was to do chores like any other kid, take care of 10+ animals a day, help my parents out when told. When I had hit my senior year all of the teachers that had me for classes noticed I started to pick up the pace, and try my best to keep up with the class or ahead and sometimes managed so. My English teacher would sometimes tell me good things about my work and how proud others are. Obviously I was unable to finish and took the big step at coming back for another year, and sometimes getting made fun of by some kids, but I stop and I have to laugh because unlike most of the kids making fun of me I am actually trying something that I knew would be a big risk to take. I also have to laugh at my younger self because I sat in class sometimes with questions on what to do but not taking action (typical kid) and others I knew what to do I just waited and waited to do the work until I finally started to fall behind and never going to be able to catch up on my work. When I hit late junior year into my senior that is when I tried to start throwing things back at my teachers to grade. Sitting at my mom’s kitchen table doing my membean for hours on end. Eventually, my brain was fried when I actually got a chance to sit down and enjoy a conversation with family, I typically ended up in my room playing mindless video games so I did not have to try. I worked my butt off to try to finish high school on time but I had only gotten a few essays away in every class I had left but had thousands of quizzes and tests to do in Algebra. When it got to the last month of the year I was able to look at my work only on one piece of paper halfway filling it. Sitting in the school hallway made some surrounding teachers upset, some kids would just pass by me and stare like I was weird but sitting by myself with music blasting in my ears helped me focus more on my work and I was able to manage to be able to focus more on not getting distracted easily and pay attention. Sooner rather than later I was able to laugh at myself no matter what kind of mood I was in. I laugh at myself for not getting up and asking questions at the risk of sounding dumb to my classmates because they find the work easier than I do. I know for some odd reason start getting upset towards other kids in my classroom because they think that they will be fine if they do not do the work or they just sit there in class and do nothing but play games, flipping through music or play with their phones. Then next class all you hear them do is complain at how far they are behind and I stop to think about it telling myself “That used to be you, on the plus side you complained to yourself because you knew that it was your fault for not doing your work”. I laughed the most whenever I was talking to another student and distract them. Constantly looking like I was working and talking at the same time but now actually working is putting a smile on my face.

Photo by rabbit.Hole on Foter.com / CC BY-NC-ND