With Pain Comes Laughter

Laughter is the key to anything whether it is in a good or bad situation. In 2016, my grandmother, Linda was diagnosed with dementia. Everyone who knew her were devastated, mainly just her family. When my grandmothers husband, daughter and son found out they automatically knew that life wouldn’t be the same without her. She brought the light to party anywhere and with anyone. Around the beginning of the diagnosis it wasn’t as bad as we thought it was going to be. She just couldn’t put sentences together well or remember names, which is normally how it usually begins. As 2018 began it started getting worse to the point where she wouldn’t be able to eat because she mentally and physically forgot how to. Her husband and daughter, Daryl and Kim were seeking help everywhere and from everyone. They tried everything hoping it would work. Clinical Trials, Dementia and Alzheimer doctors, Eventually they hit a dead end and all they knew is that they could cherish the moments they had with her. Fast forward to July of 2019 it got a lot worse, a point to where I thought it would never get. She got put into Woodlands Memory Care of Lewiston for a month or so to see if that would help her any, which it actually made her worse. She forgot how to eat, drink, shower, chew, swallow and walk, anything you can think of.

Everyone knew Linda to be a sweet, loving, caring, beautiful women. Linda would always be able to turn a bad moment into the good. Even though my grandmother wasn’t able to have conversations with you or put sentences together, she still brought light to the room. She still brought laughter to everyone surrounding her. Something she would say or do would change the mood in the room for everyone. The sentences may not make sense, but we still laughed. Something that was bad turned into the good.

Woodlands is surrounded with other people that has Dementia or Alzheimers. Some cases are worse than others. A lot of the elders in there forget how to eat or form sentences correctly. So, most of the time they’re like speaking jiberish to each other. Another thing that is in common with everyone there is that they forget how to shower of to go the bathroom. right when we walk in we smelt a horrible odor. When I walk into the home I hope that this time is better than the last. It’s often quiet but and there are groups of certain women or men that are having a conversation. This women does “circle time” with like 10 people I’d say. They talk about their day, the women shows picture of a food or a place and they try to guess what it is. Towards the end she reads them some kind of a story. While my grandmother was at Woodlands, my stepmom, my sister and I would always go to see her and bring her strawberry yogurt. Anything strawberry she liked. We would all sit around a table and attempt to have a conversation and for her to eat. Other elders in the home would wander around and come sit next to us at the table. When we were all talking one of the ladies brought up sex and how they are done with it because they’re too old. My grandmother then replied with “Not me I have Robert.” One time my family went to go visit her her and we had found out that she had a crush on a guy named Robert, even though she had a husband. She refused to stop seeing him and he refused to stop seeing her. Eventually he got moved to the other half of the home so they would no longer see each other. Let me tell you what he smelt so bad and he was literally obsessed with her. When we would visit her he would walk around our table and try to sit next to her. Sometimes this would be funny and sometimes it wouldn’t be. Talking with her would have its ups and downs. When she would see us walk into a room she would say Hi and always have a big smile on her face.

No matter what the situation is you can always change it from bad to good, only if you allow yourself too. If all you’re thinking about is the bad in a situation you don’t have any room to turn it in to the good.

Photo by donnierayjones on Foter.com / CC BY