Commence With Thee

Hello graduating class of 2020, friends, family, staff and faculty of Oak Hill High School. What a year 2020 has turned out to be so far. In 2019 most thought that 2020 would for sure be the greatest year of their lives. In reality we all thought that every year so far since we were born would be our greatest year. For some it was, for others it was far from it. Even though we have struggled so much we have accomplished so much and we will continue to accomplish great things in the future. “Success is not final, failure is not fatal, it is the courage to continue that counts.” (Winston Churchill)

Since I started school I have learned many life lessons. One of the most important lessons learned is not to take people in life for granted. My brother and I were very close. We told each other everything and we were each other’s best friend. I was in eighth grade, two days before he got into the car accident that ended his life; we got into a big fight about something very insignificant like siblings usually do. The last thing I said before slamming my bedroom door in his face was, “I hate you. I wish that you were not my brother anymore.” I packed my clothes and I went to my Mammie’s house for the weekend. Two days later my wish came true and I no longer had Caleb in my life. I never thought that such a horrible wish would come true because none of my other wishes came true. I never got a unicorn named Geoffrey, or that baby doll that I wanted when I was five when I wished upon a star hoping those things would magically appear on my front porch the next morning. 

Instead, I woke up to my Mammie telling me to not go on my phone because my grandmother called and told her to tell me that. One hour later my grandmother and father pulled up in the driveway and I met them at the back door. My father started crying and I had no idea what was going on so instinctively I rushed over to hug him and comfort him. Muffled by my shoulder I could just barely make out the words, “Your brother is dead” the last thing I expected to hear from dad’s mouth. I looked at my gram and she shook her head with a hollow, sad face. Now every time I think about my brother I think about how the last thing I told him was “I hate you”. From that point on I never took advantage of anyone ever again. I also made sure to tell the people that mean a lot to me that I love them as often as I could. I also learned to live everyday like it is the last day I will be alive. My brother died at the same age that I am now, seventeen years old. I learned that life is fragile and it can shatter into a million pieces in the blink of an eye. 

I used to be a chronic liar. I would make elaborate things up about myself in order to seem cooler than I really was. I did not want to disappoint people with my mundane life. This means that I never had a deaf, blind great great grandfather that lived to be 110. My cat never picked her nose and threw it at me. And to clear up the question that I know some of my fellow classmates will ask, No, the house next door was never haunted and it never had a head in a big glass jar on a shelf that I found by breaking in through the back window. There are many more things that I have lied about in my life and I learned the hard way that in order to make friends it was inevitably easier to tell the truth straight up and be myself. Be yourself because no one can do that better than you can. At the beginning of my sophomore year I had a fling with one of my guy friends. I told him that I liked him more than a friend and I made it seem like I was really interested in him. I realised after a few weeks that I really did not like him more than a friend. I told him that I did not want anything more than friendship. He was hurt by it and he wanted to hurt me back. He told my best friend a bunch of things that were false about me. My best friend stopped talking to me for a while. When she eventually let me talk to her I told her my side of the story and I was lucky enough to get her back as a friend. I learned that lying about your feelings not only hurts the person that you are telling them to, but it also hurts you. Lying hurts everyone. Be yourself.

I recently learned that in order to accomplish goals in life I need to work harder and stay focused. As of the second week in May I finished all of my classes. Meaning I finished high school two weeks early. I made sure that I got everything done in each of my classes so I was able to graduate. My goal is to go to college to become an early childhood educator.  During the first semester of senior year I did not do my work on time. This made it so my work was not up to par so I had to redo it multiple times. I learned the hard way that if I wanted to pass I have to do my work as soon as I get it and do it the right way the first time. At the end of the first semester I almost did not pass because I did not do all of the work that was required. I was so scared about not passing that I started to put more effort into my work and do it on time. My whole life I have had social anxiety about talking to people about myself. My grandmother would speak for me and she encourages me to speak for myself. When I started school I had to learn quickly that in order to know what needs to be done I have to ask questions. I would go to the doctor’s office and sit there while my grandmother would answer all of the questions about me, for me. I thought that if I asked for help that I was weak or people would think that I was dumb. I now ask questions because I know that the questions I ask can actually help my fellow peers.  I want my fellow peers that are afraid to speak up to know that in order to gain knowledge you have to ask questions.  Do not be afraid to ask questions.

Thank you regional school unit #4 for helping to teach me some of these life lessons and many more. Thank you to my family and friends for being my rocks when I felt like I was going to float away. I also want to thank my fellow peers that I did not get the pleasure to know better, for teaching me unintended lessons by sharing personal stories on the class blog. Thank you.

Photo by Julie (thanks for 9 million views) on Foter.com / CC BY-NC-SA