Toxic Friends

When you hear the sentence “There’s no such thing as a stupid question” do you actually believe it? I know that when I hear that sentence I don’t believe it. When I hear that sentence I think to myself “Stupid questions are what help us understand some things” and how there are many stupid questions I’ve asked in front of everyone and every time I ask them I remember the exact feeling of embarrassment my face getting hot and feeling a lump in my throat from everyone suddenly looking at me. It makes me think ” I should have just said nothing and thought more before I said anything”. It makes me think about all the times I’ve asked a stupid question in a quiet classroom full of students doing work and everyone turned away from their schoolwork to look at me and the stupid question I asked. It always makes me afraid to ask another question because I don’t want to ask another stupid question. Even though at the moment when I ask stupid questions it makes my face feel like its burning and I can only imagine how red my face is getting and then all of the people around me put down what they’re doing and just look at me like I’m stupid which makes me even more scared to ask another question. It makes you wish that you could just go home and never see the people you asked the stupid question in front of again. It makes me question why teachers and other people say that there aren’t stupid questions when there really are. I make a face when they say it because it’s not fully true. I’ve asked many questions that are stupid throughout the 12 years I’ve been in school because I didn’t use common sense to think about it when I’m in school and surrounded by a group of people who were previously silent and now are all looking at me. Afterward making me wish I didn’t say anything because now I have about 10 different people just staring at me It makes me afraid to ask the question in case someone judges me and thinks that I am stupid because of my question. It makes me afraid that someone will hear me and think about how stupid my question is and wonder why I would ask something like that. It seems to make it worse than it already is when you’re in a place surrounded by people who will judge you for your stupid question. For example, when I ask my friends if it’s a good idea to go back to my toxic friend or if it’s a good idea if I should text them or not. It happens a lot where someone might ask a dumb question and then can answer it themselves after they think about it, it’s all when you don’t think before asking the question. Like when you’re in school and you ask a dumb question about what you are talking about in the class and after you say it you understand why it was a stupid question.

One major time I’ve felt like I asked a really stupid question is when I’m doing something and not thinking clearly. For instance one of the times I’ve asked a stupid question is when I ask my friends if I should text someone about how I actually feel. It always makes me feel stupid when I ask it because the answers are always no and it would be better if I just kept it to myself. Then I look at my friend’s reactions and they all seem to think I am stupid for thinking about it and it makes me feel like I shouldn’t have asked the question and makes me think more about what I asked or when I ask my friends if I should be friends with one of my toxic ex-friends, the answer is always no, and that I should know better than to do that. When I’m in school surrounded by semi-quiet class and I ask a stupid question and the class just goes quiet and looks at me it just makes the stupid question even worse. After I say the question it makes me wish I could just go home and go back to bed, and makes me even more afraid to ask the question again. It always makes me afraid to ask the question to my friend just in case someone else can hear me. It makes me scared that if I ask the question someone else will hear it and make the question even worse than it was before. I always ask without really thinking about what I actually am doing. When I am thinking clearly I know not to text them or go back to their friendship but at the moment it seems like the right idea but in reality, it is a dumb question that will have consequences. Sometimes I feel like asking dumb questions is a good thing because you have people there telling you that it is a stupid question and a stupid thing to do.

Although sometimes it may be an embarrassing moment when you ask the question there will always be people there to help you know how stupid your question is and be there to tell you that it would be better if you thought about it. Sometimes it can be embarrassing to ask the question especially if it’s in front of people who may judge you for your stupid question but in reality, it can be helpful to say them even though they can be stupid. But in the end, it’s always worth it to ask the question even though it may be stupid. It can be embarrassing and make you feel really stupid but it always makes you think about the question you asked and if it’s a good idea or not. When I ask stupid questions it makes me feel embarrassed when other people hear them and judge me. When I ask stupid questions like if I should go back to a toxic friend it makes me feel embarrassed that I would want to do that and that other people heard my stupid question too. The point of this essay is to show there are many things that are considered stupid questions and that it can be very scary when asking the question knowing other people might be judging you.

“Computer Keyboard” by BigOakFlickr is licensed under CC BY-SA 2.0.