I hate you, Mrs. Lake

In fourth grade I got stuck with a teacher I hated named Mrs. Lake, she traumatized me for not asking a question, and further shaming from my classmates.

Growing up I was anxious and socially inept so asking for help was out of the question, that’s when I hit fourth grade and met Mrs. Lake, we were doing a math lesson (I don’t remember what because I tried to suppress this memory, probably long division or something important like that) and I, of course, didn’t understand and out of fear of looking stupid, this was my first year out of the assisted math and I wanted people to think I wasn’t a total idiot. She wrote a question on the board and asked if anyone knew the answer, no one raised their hand. That’s when she called on me.

Mortification, that’s what I felt, I looked at the board and uttered the words that would mark my social death sentence, “I don’t know” ” She SCOFFED and asked “If you don’t know why didn’t you ask questions?” and I said, in my poor nine-year-old honest brain said, “I was scared”. LAUGHTER. I tried to learn from that, the next week when I got confused I mustered all of my bravery to ask a question. Apparently, It was a stupid one because a boy, I think his name was Jaiden, commented, I don’t even remember what he said but I broke into tears and I became a laughing stock once more.

luckily I moved that year and never talked to them again but this has still had lasting effects, I can’t explain the thought processes of my work, I can’t have anyone behind me while I’m working, I can’t ask questions out loud, I feel like crying whenever I’m picked to do something, Fourth grade SUCKED and it’s all because I didn’t ask a question and Mrs. Lake publicly, shamed me.

“teacher meme” by PTICA10 is licensed under CC BY 2.0.