A Controversial Hobby

*Polishes Winchester* Oh…Hello there. Forgive me for I did not see you enter my domain. By the way what are you doing here? What, did the NSA finally tip you off and let you know what kind of dangerous person I truly am and that the Charismatic teenager that you once knew and loved is actually an escaped convict from the SCP containment center and has been hanging out in the Maine suburbs for years now? Just kidding ladies and gentlemen of course I know why your here, your here for my Commencement speech of course *Short Laughter*, but seriously tho don’t look into that SCP stuff, it uh…it gets messy.

But with all seriousness, hello faculty, staff, family of, and class of 2020. It has been a long, tumultuous ride, but we have made it and the banner of our celebration flies across the sky. Huuuuuh, I truly know now what it felt like to be the Soviet Union taking Germany that glorious September day of 1945. We have made a lot of friends, for some of you perhaps some enemies, but overall a perfected High School life that was conditioned in what I think any logical person would consider to be a perfect utopian academic setting…*bursts into uncontrollable laughter* I’m sorry, I can’t…*laughs some more* I can’t say that with a straight face. I mean seriously guys with all the fights, threats, personal tragedy, and virus we have suffered throughout these past four years it’s a mystery we all remain mentally stable. I mean personally throughout the events of this quarantine I finally feel my brain transforming into the equivalent of that of the last remaining survivor of Russian Sleep Experiment. However, even with the ever so very eventful last four school years, we have still managed to come out on top. I am proud of all of you.

But with the small talk out of the way, I would like to proceed to the current point. I would like to propose a question to you. What do you do when a certain hobby or passion of yours that has been such for as long as you had the ability to hold the object of that hobby or passion in your hand, happens to also be the subject of an age old controversy for years, decades, centuries, heck even since the very invention of said hobby or passion? What, no! Not video games, although that general description would match that very topic perfectly, especially for myself. However that is not the topic of this speech. You see that hobby/passion for me has always been guns, so much so that I am still a current collector today and it’s hard describing how you feel on that subject when, growing up a Gen-Z, all your exposed to when you turn on the news are mass shootings here, mass shootings there, but most impactful of all mass school shootings.

Exposition Time! It won’t be too boring I promise. See from the moment I could wrap my hand around and comprehend what a toy gun was I was having a ball, even more fun when I had a friend around. I still remember the days of my second grade, history buff, socially awkward self that would dress up in a navy blue sweatshirt, blue jeans, and a blue Civil War cap, grab one of my toy cap rifles, parade outside by myself, and pretend I was that of Union Infantry during the American Civil War. I know, huge nerd, am I right. As time passed, I began to put away the toy guns and look into the real ones. This is where my grandfather comes to be a major player in this story as he has always been. Everything in my life pertaining to firearms, I owe to that man. Ever Since I showed an interest, he has been there, teaching me how to maintain, keep, handle, take care of, use, reload, aim, and fire. He gave me the great respect that I have for firearms and the importance of the Second Amendment. He taught me how to hunt (tho we never caught anything together). He taught me almost everything I know. But one thing always stood out to me overall, his all time famous quote passed down to him from his father; “Owning a gun is a privilege, not a right.”. I have always carried that sense of responsibility with me. 

Prior to High School I never really had or voiced any hot takes, but one thing I always felt strongly on were firearms. Of course High School did come and that’s when I started off my Freshman year, an Alt-Right Wing power house, Although, nothing was Authoritarian about my position on guns. At this time mass school shootings were still happening and I responded to it with my same old rage filled response. Oh, how I would go on about how this is entirely the fault of the shooter and people like him are the reason people like me cant live a normal social life in society. I was so selfish, I only thought of things as a gun owner, never as another actual human being. I was already a social cockroach of an Edgelord as it was, I didn’t need to bring any of my Second Amendment hot takes into the conversation. Well that year was fun wasn’t it, alright whatever, let’s just move on to the next. Come the time of my birthday the summer before my Sophomore year, and I receive my very own gun cabinet. Ahead of time, my grandfather purchased some firearms as first additions to the cabinet for the day I would receive it. It was official, I was a gun owner!

It was at that time, I also decided to purchase a hat that perfectly described me at the time, a Sons of Liberty baseball cap with a picture of a Colt Commando on it and the simple message underneath; “Come and take it!”. I wore it loud and proud my Sophomore year, idiotically hoping to not face harassment even though it was inevident. I wore it in each class, and almost each class I got made fun of, mocked, or teased for it. It felt like everyone thought I was just some gun nut. It didn’t help that at the time I was still a bit socially reserved. It felt like everytime I voiced somewhat of a respect or interest in guns, I got the same old snarky, outcasting comment; “Hey, Bryce. Do you really think that’s appropriate for school *donkey laughter*?” or “Oh, please, don’t shoot up our school *more donkey laughter*.”. By then I understood the pain and effects of bullying and how it could change people. I still remember the time I was reading a Guns & Ammo magazine on the bus ride home and somebody commented to me; “Hey, Bryce. Do you really think that’s appropriate for school *donkey laughter*?”. A quite ironic comment I could say the least, considering the fact that this specific person got into a fight just days earlier, over something as petty and trifling as a joke. I calmly replied; “How about you mind your own business.”. As quickly as I could have pulled my head up I darted it back down into the pages of the magazine. Their snickering didn’t stop tho, obviously. I could hear the laughing, mockery, and that classic mockery toned, “Oh, please, don’t shoot up our school *more donkey laughter*.”. I knew it wasn’t worth it, don’t give them what they want, don’t let them gauge your reaction. I just had to remember that I was a student and I was not there for them, I was there for my schoolwork, get good grades and get out. A couple weeks or months later, Parkland happened. It was all over the news, a kid only around my age, walked into Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School and shot up the building with an AR-15. I didn’t know what to think at first, my mind immediately started to race with emotions of concern, anger, frustration, confusion, and a very imposing question; “Why?”. I knew one thing tho, I kept that hat off me anytime I left the house. 

My reaction started to change, I no longer focused all my energy and anger into hating the actual shooter and began to blame everyone around him, everyone who could have prevented it. At this point Sophomore year was coming to an end and boy, was it a stressful one. But that’s a story for another time. I’m not going to lie, ladies and gentlemen 2017-2018 was a hard year for any gun owner, young or old, black or white, male or female, any type of owner. People tend to forget that the faceless corporate NRA are not the only ones who receive harassment, it’s us too. We are always scrutinized for being a common cause of the massacres, with our constant demand for no interference with the Second Amendment. But can you honestly blame them. That debate would lead us on into my Junior year of High School. You see, I did a full 180° on my Political Compass and with growing left wing ideologies, lets just say I soon became very- Okay, alright, I was Commie alright, I bought the Manifesto and everything. However one thing about me remained very libertarian, my position on guns. I became fascinated with the research of shooters, mass murderers, killers, and evil of all sorts. I wanted to get inside their heads, find out what made them tick, and most importantly why did they do it. What did the family and close friends of the culprit have to say? I even started binge watching Criminal Minds at the beginning of my Junior year. Through my personal research, I have found it to be the perfect storm of neglect and bullying, so much so that a certain Criminal Minds quote from the “Elephant’s Memory” episode, said by Dr. Reid, still sticks with me, “But you could have prevented it.”. Of course there is only so much someone can do for mental illness. But here’s the scary part, I could almost relate to them I can imagine someone else succumbing to the constant harassment for just being the outcast and snapping, What’s that quote from “Joker”, “They think that we’ll just sit there and take it like good little boys, that we won’t werewolf, and go wild.” People think social hierarchies are bad enough in the real world, the adult world, but they can be even worse in high school. People refuse to understand what it’s like to be damned, alone.

What I also looked into that year was the constant paranoia of the Libertarian Right Militias. When I watched that twenty-three minute Vice documentary on the Georgia III Percenters, all I could think is no wonder why people are always wary even around “responsible” gun owners. They are always suiting up in full camouflage military uniforms as soldier wanna-be’s, and claiming that they are a militia for the people of the United States and they must defend their constitutional rights. Where were they when Parkland happened? Heck where was I when parkland happened? How can we claim a hold to the whole Second Amendment when we only want to use it for personal gain and never to protect others as a Militia. 

In conclusion, what I hope to get across to you today, is not that of self-pity or a plea for sympathy. I have nothing to truly complain about, I am a privileged, young, individual with loving, caring, and (if need-be) intervening parents, and I am void of mental illness. The personal accounts of bullying I recounted here was that of mere petty comments and insults. The point I try to get across is sympathy for others, please, (for god’s sake) look for the signs, don’t cast a kid out, look down on him, or bully him for being a bit of a quiet Edgelord. Remember the minute you graduate and exit those double doors, your popularity goes six feet under. It’s not worth absolutely wreaking the quiet kid in the back of the classroom. As for that quiet Edglord that will succeed me that is currently among the Underclassmen, I beseech you to hang in there. Though you may consider yourself talentless, uninvolved, uninteresting, or might just prefer your lonesome personality, that is also not worth it. Trust me the only way I transformed from the quiet loner that I was to the charming, charismatic, and intelligent young man I am right now is because- Sorry, went on a bit of an ego-stroke thare, is because I took a chance, I became more involved, I became more open minded. But if you’re still not comfortable, just be the best that you can be. And as for all you young gun owners out there, remember, owning, collecting, and using a firearm is not just a right, not just a privilege, but it is also a responsibility. Thank you.

Photo by Thomas Hawk on Foter.com / CC BY-NC