Hallie

1. Your occupation (or hobby)

Picking up sticks in the woods  (Ok if I’m being honest, they’re more like branches 2 times the size of me. I love dragging them out onto the lawn, but sometimes I have trouble. My branch usually gets caught in the thick of the woods, so I have to regather and give it another tug)

2. Your favorite color

Purple (The color of my baby toy, which I’ve worn down to more of a rag by now. My dad would say it’s disgusting, so we don’t use it for tug of war anymore. At this point its just a comfort toy)

3. Your favorite flower

Pink Geraniums (These are in grandma’s garden! I think they’re supposed to be used for visual pleasure, but I love to use them for a roll-around massage. The plant is all flat now. That one is on me)

4. Your favorite food and drink

Water and Purina Pro (Water is always so refreshing and its tough to stop drinking after that first lap. More often than not it ends up on the floor and not actually in my mouth. I may or may not dunk my paws in my bowl…)

5. What is in your garbage can right now?

Leftover’s from dinner (The smell is very enticing! But the cupboard door that leads to the trash always stays closed. I try to weasel my nose inside, but I always have a limited window is limited. Dad always catches me. I can never win!)

6. What is on your nightstand or desk?

My carrot rope and maybe some water (Maybe even a flashlight for the wee hours of the night when I have to go “potty”)

7. Where would you like to live if you could live anywhere?

My aunt and uncle’s house (My best friend Piper lives there, and we love to wrestle and cause trouble. The only problem is that my arch nemesis Molly also lives there. Which is generally not a problem but she can be intimidating. She makes me look like a scaredy cat. Isn’t that ironic?)

8. Which words or phrases do you most overuse?

“Let’s play fetch!” “Get it from me! I bet you can’t!” “I love you!” “I’m gonna pee myself!” “Is there room for me?”

9. What is your most treasured possession?

My collar (I’m very territorial with my collar and I don’t like it taken off. They tried to hide it on me. Why do they get so much pleasure from teasing me and watching me suffer?

10. The super power or natural talent you’d like to be gifted with

Invisibility (So nobody can see me sneaking off into the woods. But then again that could be worse. God they’d be screaming my name for hours)

11. Your hero(s)

My Dad (He’s always watching over me and making sure that I’m safe. He’s taught me all I know (like how to shake paws and catch toys) and he gives me treats!)

12. Which living person do you most despise?

The vacuum. Period. (It’s tall, loud and daunting. I hate when it comes to life. It comes to life for such long intervals! I try to avoid it but it moves all over the place)

13. What qualities do you look for in a friend?

Someone that gets as excited to see me, as I do to see them. Someone who shows affection to me and makes sure I’m well fed. Someone that will throw my toys down the hallway when I’m looking for a little adrenaline rush.

14. What do you consider your greatest virtue?

Greeting people at arrival and showing them that they’re cared about. (I jump up and down and wag my tail ferociously. But it’s only because I get excited! They tell me to stay off of visitors, but sometimes I just can’t contain myself!)

15. What do you consider your main fault?

Tracking messiness through the house (My hair just falls out everywhere. I don’t know what to do about it. They say I’m shedding some kind of “winter coat.” I don’t know. I haven’t been around for very long)

16. What do you consider the most overrated virtue?

My cognitive ability to do anything (I kinda just do whatever it takes to get a treat. When my dad’s hand goes up, my paw goes up)

17. On what occasions do you lie?

When I have an accident in the house (I usually just walk away like I’ve never done it. I know it’s obvious that I’m the culprit, but what else am I supposed to do about it?)

18. What is your present state of mind?

 Insane (I’m currently in my Kennel. I’m at peace with the fact that I can’t be harmed, but I need to chase a squirrel or something)

19. When and where were you happiest?

Summer at camp (I was free in the wilderness with the lake at my paw tips. I was swimming, paddle boarding, relaxing! It was all so perfect!)

20. What is your idea of misery?

The brush (Never ever do I wish the brush on anyone. I wish the brush would have never been invented.  Brushing sessions are psychotic! I try to squirm as they hold me in place)

21. How would you wish to die?

Excessive consumption of chocolate (I know that it would ultimately be fatal. But those delectable little brown squares look too good to fear. I just hope that one day when I hear my dad open up that piece of chocolate, he will offer me a bite) 

22. What is your greatest extravagance?

The arrival at my new home (There were so many new faces that I’d never seen! And everyone was picking me up and touching me. I just wanted to take a nap! It was infuriating! I swear I would’ve stood my ground if I wasn’t so sleepy)

23. What is your greatest regret?

Chewing through my 4th bed (Yes I know! Me being bored is not an appropriate excuse. But now I sleep in the hard kennel with no bed. Really asked for that one)

24. What is your greatest fear?

The broom (Dear lord! It’s so much taller than me. And when I knocked it over that one time…)

25. Your motto

Sticks and distractions may draw me near, but words aren’t enough to catch my ear.

Featured Image: “Dogs 013” by mrspattinsonn is licensed under CC BY 2.0.